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Vices and how to positvely capitalize on having one.

Everyone has an outlet, or at least, everyone should have an outlet (vices) whether that’s walking, reading, crocheting, or meditating. It’s a space you go to regularly, a space that inflicts rest and reflection. For me, journaling is that. Yes, I love movement and it fixes most of my not-so-friendly moods or energizes me to be social, patient, and kind. But, movement is also a way I escape from myself and some of the hard decisions I have to make.

*Insert Journaling* This is the opposite of movement, it’s learning to sit with myself and look at my flaws, habits, and decisions straight on. It inspires me to tackle the anxiety from the day or reflect on the sadness looming over me. 

However, journaling is not just a place to answer difficult questions, but it’s also a space filled with fond memories. I smile at the fact that my journals have become time capsules. Once paragraphs about travels, details of dew on the side of tents. Or the amount of rain on a cross-country trip have transformed into reflections of motherhood. Questions about sleeping schedules, and the “right” way to introduce avocado to a 6-month-old. My journals have become the tails of my life – from middle school crushes to becoming my proudest title yet, Mom. 

I have let go of showing up perfectly for my moments with my journal and focus merely on showing up for myself. Writing happens when I can and hold little grip on the time of day, my surroundings, or how cozy my seat is. Without an outlet, one that allows me to sit and stew on all the good things, I am a fuse of unconscious actions that react rather than absorb.

Everyone should have an outlet or vices not because they need to follow my instructions and reason, but because it allows you to be the better version of yourself. When you show up for yourself, you are allowing yourself the capacity to show up for others.