During my pregnancy with my son, I found myself expending a lot of energy worrying about what my postpartum fitness regimen would entail. Physical activity was closely tied to my sense of self – whether it was walking, running, weightlifting, or climbing. I wondered how I would define myself if I couldn’t depend on exercise to restore my balance. When I was pregnant with my son, I spent so much energy stressing about what my postpartum fitness routine would look like. Movement was intertwined with my identity – walking, running, lifting, climbing, etc. Who would I be if I couldn’t rely on exercise to bring me back to equilibrium?
I had a low-stress pregnancy and enjoyed pushing my limits with movement while also growing my first child. Yes, some days I spent keeling over a toilet or so exhausted that the saying, “movement is medicine” just didn’t hit. But, overall, I felt stronger than I ever had. I took carb-loading to a new level, fueling my workouts with my 2nd-trimester craving, Jelly Bellies. Although I was setting personal bests in big lifts, I wouldn’t say I felt like a maternal princess with shiny hair and thick nails. But, I felt STRONG.
So, what happens afterward? I didn’t have control of that. I worried I would lose that version of myself and become a snippet of the days I ran fast. Those first few months were HARD. My body ached and it craved rest. I internally fought with myself, getting upset that I wasn’t bouncing back. Not to mention the addition of “mom guilt.” I felt awful wanting to leave, to escape. I equally wanted to snuggle my new baby and throw some weights around.
Postpartum fitness
My first attempt at postpartum fitness was a run. When I took my first postpartum run, I felt like I was learning to walk, uncoordinated and awkward. My body was entirely different, it wasn’t light and springy like my pre-pregnancy body and wasn’t strong like my pregnancy body. It was jiggly, heavy and my joints felt unstable. Although I felt defeated after a 2-mile run/walk, I was determined to find my mojo again. To make this body mine.
Now I am 10 months postpartum. I recently PR’d in a Half Marathon and will be running my FIRST MARATHON in October, followed by a 50 miler in January. I’m feeling strong, but mainly, I feel proud. I am proud of myself for not giving up on this new version of me as I feel empowered by facing a challenge and doing it anyway.
I incorporate movement now because I am a mom, not because I want to beat my previous race time or heavy lift. My identity is now layers of titles; mom, runner, climber, couch potato, etc. And I recognize that I must be intentional, ask for help, and be adaptable. Postpartum fitness is possible with the proper mindset.